choosing change

A year ago this week, I agreed to relocate to Denmark. I cried all the way from my office to the hotel, overwhelmed with anxiety and hoping I wasn't making the biggest mistake of my life. I knew what I had but I didn't know what I was getting into, and I was pretty sure I didn't have a good handle on what I was giving up, and that was terrifying.

That might sound a little weird, but it's that whole Joni Mitchell "you don't know what you've got 'til it's gone" thing. That line from Big Yellow Taxi stuck in my head, nagging me for months, and choosing change was one of the most frightening things I've ever done.

Coming full circle with my decision, I know now that it's ok to choose something different. The leaves fall, the earth goes dormant, then it slowly comes alive again.

Tonight, instead of dreading as I have for so many years, the impending Thanksgiving and Christmas traditions of expectations, the requisite dead bird, and snide comments, I'm looking forward to a week in Italy, followed by a low stress Thanksgiving, and Christmas among friends.

The most frightening part of this change was choosing it. But true to nature, the winter has passed, and everything is coming alive again. I'm off to Italy on Sunday :)